I have a ton of stuff on my mind right now and don't know where to begin. There are times that organizing my thoughts is an impossible task. So yeah, I'm going to make an attempt. Right now, I'm a bit frustrated/confused/pensive/"I just don't know"/happy/anxious/excited/scared/overwhelmed.... With that said, let me attempt to make sense of it all and share a bit of my heart with you.
Most recently, my thoughts have been three-fold. I've been thinking of God's plan for my life and what to do now, I have been really appreciating the relationships I have with friends and family, and a curiosity has been sparked in my mind about some topics of the Christian faith. God has definitely brought me to a place right now, where I have to put my faith in Him and trust that everything that is happening in my life is part of His ultimate plan. I have gotten distracted recently and lost sight of my purpose, but God is re-igniting that flame in my heart. But in order for a flame of desire to burn in our hearts for God, we must sacrifice whatever is filling our hearts currently. I like to think of a sacrifice as "giving up something you love for something or someone that you love more". Now, I'm not sure if I heard that somewhere or came up with it on my own, but how true? If we truly love God more than anything or anyone else, we will be willing to give up whatever we have in our grasp to reach out to Him. I believe God has an amazing plan for my life and I am living it, but I also believe that in order for me to live the John 10:10 life, I must let go of that which I hold dear to me and reach out for Him.
John 10:10
10The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy; I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full.
As for the relationships in my life right now, I am learning from them too. For the first time in my life, I am beginning to trust people again. I have learned to let go of the past and love with all I have. I have amazing people that have been placed in my life who love me and go above and beyond. They make sacrifices for me and for that I am SO grateful. I'm also learning how to be vulnerable around those I love. For so long, I have been putting up the "I'm ok and have everything under control" front and I'm through with that. This past year I have learned that it is ok for me not to be ok...
I might have been a little off in saying that my thoughts were "three-fold", because I have one or two other things I'd like to mention before I get to the third "thought" on my list above. I want to take a moment to talk about choir practice last night... I had a normal day at work yesterday and then an amazing time at Freshman orientation. I was able to talk to some people and tell them about Campus Crusade and according to Drew, I was extremely "peppy". Then I got to choir practice and we began to sing. Then Liv came in late and shared an amazing story about the youth service and God's presence was in the room! It was everywhere. The songs we are singing are amazing... not just because of the music or the lyrics, but because of the truth that we are proclaiming in them. The praise and thanksgiving we are offering to the ONE TRUE GOD. I was overwhelmed with praise last night and during the last song, "God is Here", I was moved to tears. The tears were not tears of joy, nor tears of sorrow. They were tears of amazement, of awe, that we serve such a Holy, Awesome, and Mighty God. Here are the words:
Ok, after having said all of this... I think this blog has reached it's limit length-wise. While I am not tired of typing, you might be getting a bit tired of reading. I will talk about my other two thoughts tomorrow. One of them is the doctrine of election (not a debate, just a thought about it) and the other is Campus Crusade. I hope these words from my heart have been clear and purposeful. I hope that I have said something that has stirred your heart and made you think about what God is doing in your life... pray for ignition of the flame in your heart, I know I am praying hard for it!
John 10:10
10The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy; I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full.
As for the relationships in my life right now, I am learning from them too. For the first time in my life, I am beginning to trust people again. I have learned to let go of the past and love with all I have. I have amazing people that have been placed in my life who love me and go above and beyond. They make sacrifices for me and for that I am SO grateful. I'm also learning how to be vulnerable around those I love. For so long, I have been putting up the "I'm ok and have everything under control" front and I'm through with that. This past year I have learned that it is ok for me not to be ok...
I might have been a little off in saying that my thoughts were "three-fold", because I have one or two other things I'd like to mention before I get to the third "thought" on my list above. I want to take a moment to talk about choir practice last night... I had a normal day at work yesterday and then an amazing time at Freshman orientation. I was able to talk to some people and tell them about Campus Crusade and according to Drew, I was extremely "peppy". Then I got to choir practice and we began to sing. Then Liv came in late and shared an amazing story about the youth service and God's presence was in the room! It was everywhere. The songs we are singing are amazing... not just because of the music or the lyrics, but because of the truth that we are proclaiming in them. The praise and thanksgiving we are offering to the ONE TRUE GOD. I was overwhelmed with praise last night and during the last song, "God is Here", I was moved to tears. The tears were not tears of joy, nor tears of sorrow. They were tears of amazement, of awe, that we serve such a Holy, Awesome, and Mighty God. Here are the words:
There is a sweet anointing in the sanctuarySIMPLY AMAZING!
There is a stillness in the atmosphere
Come and lay down
The burdens you have carried
For in this sanctuary God is here
Chorus
He is here, He is here
To break the yoke and lift the heavy burdened
He is here, He is here
To heal the hopeless heart and bless the broken
Come and lay down
The burdens you have carried
For in this sanctuary God is here
Ok, after having said all of this... I think this blog has reached it's limit length-wise. While I am not tired of typing, you might be getting a bit tired of reading. I will talk about my other two thoughts tomorrow. One of them is the doctrine of election (not a debate, just a thought about it) and the other is Campus Crusade. I hope these words from my heart have been clear and purposeful. I hope that I have said something that has stirred your heart and made you think about what God is doing in your life... pray for ignition of the flame in your heart, I know I am praying hard for it!
